23rd December 2009 Reinvent yourself a kilometre at a time.
24th December 2009 Handphone socks are the new Cool.
25th December 2009 My dress code reads: Order from Chaos
28th December 2009 Before learning to sing, one must learn to listen.
7th March 2010 There is only so thin a line between being distrustful and being possessive
12th March 2010 We're special in a different way
and similar in a special way
15th April 2010 Love offers sanctuary, not immunity
5th May 2010 Examinations are taken en masse But we're each of us fighting our own, lone battles
16th June 2010 A small wardrobe leaves room for creativity
8th Oct 2010 Falling down is fine. Not getting back up isn't.
19th Jan 2011 The virtual realms which our dreams sculpt are so real, they leave us in wonder at how powerful the subconscious mind could be
30th Jan 2011 You know it's a good book, when the emotions you experience overcome mental weariness, and you find yourself reading into the wee hours of morn!
15th Mar 2011 Don't just have something to look forward to. Have somebody.
23rd Aug 2011 You can lose your arguments, but never lose your faith!
21st Sep 2011 Mind over mind, then mind over matter
Sleep can wait. Beat the sunrise. / Monday, May 30, 2011
I was to join the 21KM women's category with Simster at first, but it became completely filled before I managed to register. I am a big procrastinator when it comes to signing up for races; the thought of parting with such a huge amount of money in such a short period of time deters me. In my case, anything above $25 requires a fair bit of consideration. Maybe that's why my wardrobe is relatively sparse compared to other girls my age.
Anyway, I wasn't prepared to give this year's Sundown race a miss, so I signed up for the 42.195KM challenge. Wonder why it's always .195 at the back of those numbers?
PRE-RACE
I did not formally train for the race. A training schedule which spanned 8 weeks was uploaded onto the official Sundown Marathon website and I did look through it. I knew that I could commit if I wanted to, but I was afraid that I would cause more harm to my body than help prepare it for the upcoming challenge. I even stopped swimming to save up my energy for running instead. While it is true that I could have done these activities on alternate days, I did not want to injure myself or cause parts of my body to be strained, otherwise recovery will take the place of light physical activity too often.
In the days leading up to the race, I tried to run about 3-4 times a week. I am unsure as to the distance that was covered during each of those runs, but I usually spend about 45 minutes to an hour. The longest stretch I went at a go was about 1 hour and 45 minutes. Looking back, I think longer training runs would have helped me substantially, but I get quite bored running for too long on my own. Like who doesn't, right? Unless they are 1) super hardcore or 2) super emo.
RACE DAY
On the race day, I watched Kungfu Panda 2 in the afternoon with Koh. Nice, but the first was definitely better. Can't remember much about that day. Oh and I also slept a lot, in hopes that it will vanquish any soporific sensations that I might encounter in the evening.
We boarded the shuttle bus at Singapore Expo; it will take us to the race site at Changi Exhibition Centre in approximately 45 minutes. Unfortunately, a major congestion occurred along the way and when the bus was not inching forward at a painfully slow speed, it was completely stationary. Koh fell asleep on the bus; I looked out the windows occasionally to watch the 21KM participants, who had been flagged off at 8PM. It was 9+ and the 42KM flag-off was at 10PM. Time was creeping by...
After what felt like an hour-long ride, we arrived at last! The passengers, me included, alighted eagerly and we began our brisk walk toward the carnival area. After deciding where we would meet after the race, Koh walked me to the red carpet before the starting line, assisting me with my baggage. (Otherwise I would have had to queue at baggage deposit and start even later!)
I ambled towards the START gantry, started my stopwatch, and jogged the first steps of my 42.195KM.
FIRST 10KM
The first 10KM of the race was manageable, even easy. I breathed comfortably and took light, silent steps. I followed this black singlet dude for quite a distance. His stride frequency appeared to be quite high, and though I had told myself that I could fall off anytime and resume at my own pace, I surprised myself by following him and overtaking him eventually. For the most of this segment, I was deeply focused on maintaining a good running posture. Infortunately, part of the sole of my right shoe became partially detached. I could sorta feel it when my shoe came into contact with the ground. I thought peeling it off might make things worse, so I just continued running with that lil bit of sole flapping around.
Certain parts of the route were unlit. In these areas, I would look up to see a map of stars glittering in the sky. That was about the only thing that distracted me; it was a beautiful sight to behold.
My so-called plan was to finish 10KM in 1hour 10mins, 20KM in 2hours 20mins, 30KM in 3hours 30mins and 42KM in around 4hours 40mins. Easy and simple to follow. I reached the 10KM and 20KM markers under the stipulated time and I think I just met the time for 30KM. Finishing 42KM in 4hours and 40mins would have been spectacular, but predictably the last stretch foiled my plan. On hindsight I think my plan was not bad, though. Another part of my plan was that I would try to walk as little as possible. Some had a walk-run strategy, but I was keen to stick to my own.
21KM ONWARDS
I recall that when I ran past the 21KM marker, I exclaimed jubilantly to myself, "Yay I finished a half-marathon!" Another half to go!
For a while I also followed this dude wearing a Silent Warrior shirt. I think the words kinda attracted me heh. Not sure how and when he disappeared.
I hit the wall at around 25KM to 30KM. I wasn't overcome with a sudden explosive spasm of pain, as the phrase seems to suggest, but the pain in the soles of my feet, my thighs and my knees became more acute. With an increasing distance covered, I slowed down at hydration stations more regularly to grab a cup of 100 plus.
The stupid thing was that in my attempt to combat thirst and replace fluid loss, I also filled my stomach with gas. My stomach kinda swelled and I had to slow down slightly to avoid getting stitches. Plus I can't burp -all the burps I've had in my life were accidental -and so I had to put up with never-ending gurgles. In case you think this is worthy of Ripley's Believe-it-or-not then do a Google search for "gurgling in throat" and you'll see that there is a world of people out there like me who can't burp kthxbai. Hmm.. what about farting, you ask. Seriously, I don't think it's that easy for flatulence to pass like a pleasant breeze when your body is in motion.
At some point there were volunteers offering Counterpain. The person squeezed the cream onto my palm so I assumed that it was not meant for eating and slicked it over my sore legs. It made my legs burn and the heat did reduce my pain a little, but the effect wore off not long after.
There were also 2 stations where Powergels were offered. I had no idea what "gels" were and did not find out prior to the race, but I took one anyway. I heard while passing the volunteer that mine was vanilla-flavoured. I jogged while trying to open the packet but to no avail. Thus, I seeked help by jogging beside this walking guy and politely asked if he could open the packet for me. He fiddled with it for a while and yay he opened it! A few seconds before I put the gel to my mouth I wondered if it was really edible and if not, will I die? Common sense told me that it could be safely consumed (and besides the volunteer said "vanilla-flavoured"), so I threw any doubts to the wind and sure enough, I ate it without killing myself. Almost immediately, I felt better and more energised!
30KM ONWARDS
"The race is the toughest from 30KM onwards". This statement kept repeating in my head. I couldn't agree more. Every step that I took felt like I was crushing stones with my feet. My knees were breaking; my legs battled with an insane ache and they just kept screaming at me to stop bloody moving them. I never felt my legs hurt so badly before. I just wanted to walk. But I had planned not to walk, and I had learnt during my training runs that jogging, no matter how slow, will always be faster than walking. I had my share of enjoying the race during the first 21KM, for the remainder of the race I wanted to push myself to achieve a good timing.
However, I did walk. I walked from 3hours 40mins to 3hours 45mins, according to my stopwatch. I never expected that walking would hurt so bad! When I stopped jogging, the pain took its chance to concentrate upon and assault my legs. I was struggling just to walk and put one foot in front of the other. I closed my eyes for several seconds during that period. The pain was overwhelming. I forced myself to jog after 5 minutes of walking. It took sheer physical and mental force to start up the dying engines within my legs again. Take it slow, I told myself, keep up the momentum. I wanted so badly to walk again, but I reasoned against all my senses that jogging was the lesser pain of the two and I just had to keep going, don't stop! Keep it up keep it up, you're doing great! Every step that you take is a step forward!!! (Good that I drilled this self-created motto into my head a long time ago)
My breathing became laboured and the gurgles were like gas bubbles trying to escape by rising from my oesophagus but simultaneously obstructing the passage of air. While that might not be scientifically accurate, that was what I felt went on in my throat or windpipe or gullet or whatever. It felt a bit like I was going to vomit, and sometimes when the gurgle couldn't get out I just had to swallow it back, otherwise the air couldn't come in. Don't forget that all this time I am still desperately pushing forward! Kept thinking that I shouldn't have drank so much 100 plus along the way, although I really don't think I drank a lot.
35KM ONWARDS
After 35KM, my spirits were wailing, whining and dying. Out of every 5 people you see ahead of you, only 1 or even none are still jogging. The road just stretched on. The motivation for most came in the form of the next hydration station, the next distance marker or the Barcelona v.s. ManU football match that was showing at the carnival area. After each distance marker that I passed, I would look at my watch and determine how much time I took for that 1KM and calculate how much more time I will take to complete the race. Quite amazed that I can resort to doing Math. when I am so exhausted. Frankly, it's hard to tell yourself, "Yay! I have covered 36KM!" Instead, you will be more receptive to a curse in the style of, "I still have 6KM to cover!!! No, make that 6.195KM!!! ARGHHHHHHH!!!!!"
I wanted to give up. I really really did. My legs ached INTENSELY, to the degree that I need some established author to write a thousand-paged novel to convey just HOW MUCH they burned with pain. I wanted to approach a marshal along the way and tell him or her that I was done with this race, no more for me. From 35KM onwards, I was absolutely demoralised. Literally everyone in sight was walking, and those who were jogging simply overtook me as though they were running a 10KM race. 1KM is about 3 rounds around a standard track -an excruciatingly long distance to struggle from one distance marker to another. At one point, I visualised 3 rounds of the track laid end-to-end along the road ahead and saw the next distance marker. Seems like both a good and a bad strategy to me -good because the distance marker was "in sight" and bad in that it was still 3 rounds away.
36... 37... 38... 39. The 30-something KMs were utterly insane. The distance markers cheered me on but simultaneously put me down. Thankfully, thank heaven and earth, I had a supporter waiting for me at the carnival area, beyond the finish line. I told myself, again and again, that Koh was waiting for me at the finish line. Afterward I will be able to see Koh! If you want to see Koh, don't stop! Keep running! Koh is waiting for you! If you walk, then it will be much much longer before you can see Koh! The thought of him was like my only source of fuel then. If he hadn't been there, I would definitely have given up. So Mr Koh, if you're reading this (I know sooner or later you will), thank you very much for being there. I could never have accomplished this without you. I know this very, very well. I was dying, and the thought of you sustained me and kept me going. Not many people will willingly sit and wait for someone to finish a 42.195KM race.
I learnt from Leong what "mindf---ing" was when he described his SEOC experience yesterday; I couldn't have found a more apt adjective for the last segment of the race. Every step hurt like crazy. I had no more energy to spare, and I clung on desperately to that thread of mental strength that was slowly wearing out. I was extremely thirsty as well, and I used that to spur myself on -"Once you reach the finish line you can have as many bottles of 100 plus as you want!". The image of myself gulping down a bottle of that sports drink immediately surfaced in my mind. Just keep running, I said, keep running! My legs were slabs of concrete pounding hard upon the asphalt road, with no elasticity or strength -just pain, pain and more pain.
40KM ONWARDS
When I reached 40KM, an iota of power started seeping into my legs. I still felt like I could give up then; the pain was so extreme. At 41KM, I strode with my legs a few centimetres further from the pavement. The finish line was still far away, but the thought of conquering the race began to outshine those of giving up and of walking. Several runners began to speed up. Soon, the FINISH gantry was in sight and about 50 metres away. A man in front of me sped up for a while and then resumed walking! I was like COME ON LAH DON'T STOP SO NEAR ALREADY STILL STOP!!! As for me, I just kept to my own pace.
Finally, with the accompaniment of rock music blaring from the speakers and the glare of bright lights, I jogged past the FINISH gantry and stopped my watch. Yes! I have finished the race! That was probably the last thing I said to myself that night; I had already had my share of internal dialogue sessions throughout the gruelling 42.195KM. I didn't feel too great a sense of satisfaction; I was just relieved to have completed the race and that I could finally walk.
POST-RACE
I collected my finisher tee, my medal, a banana, plain water and a bottle of 100 plus and limped my way to where Koh and I had agreed to meet. Lotsa people were already there, watching the football match. I couldn't find Koh at first and sat somewhere to glance about. Then suddenly I saw him and I slowly made my way to where he sat. I had difficulty sitting and my legs still hurt like mad! No matter how I sat my legs hurt all the same. There was no comfort in sitting at all! Can you imagine that?
Anyway, now I can proudly declare that I am a finisher of the 42.195KM Sundown Marathon 2011! Will there be a next time? We shall see...
Here are some of my racing stats. This blog post is exceptionally detailed as I didn't want to forget the pain I had suffered -that would be doing it injustice.
For the next few days I will just have to limp my way everywhere. Maybe that's where the 0.195KM comes.
P.S. Before I forget, here's your shirt Mr. Koh =D